.. dear fancy | 02.09.10 ..

Dear Fancy,
I don't have a date for Valentine's. I'm sad. I want someone to give me candy hearts and blow me kisses. That sounds lame, especially from a guy, but I want my chocolate, too! Hey, by chance, what are your plans this weekend? I could take you out for a nice dinner and I'll even pay for your dessert.

Let me know. Thanks.

Cuckoo for Love

Oh, Cuckoo for Love, you're so darling! I just want to pinch your cheeks. I'm afraid it's a bit late to find a date with Valentine's being less than a week away. Are you completely opposed to escorts? Consider it.

It that doesn't work out, I'll let you take me out for dessert, but then I have to be on my way!




  1. Dear Fancy,

    My girlfriend always ask me to pull out. But I don't think it's fair because the Bible says thou shalt swallow. But I don't want to invoke the scripture because we're having premarital sex. My mom says I should date my cousin, "keep your pills close, and your cousins closer." That's what she says. What do you think I should do?

    - Swallow My Shit


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